Somethings a Mother Never Sacrfices

As parents we sacrifice a lot, yet there is one thing we do not. That is the happiness and welfare of our children. That is one thing I will not sacrifice. I will not endure if it causes risk to my son's well being and happiness. Another side will say, well all have to do things we don't want to do all for the sake of whatever and that I am denying my child. I do not think that is true and I will not sacrifice my child's well being and happiness just to be able to buy him more toys. He has plenty and his well being and happiness will reward him better in the long run than that shiny new toy that will break in 10 minuets.

Life of a single mom is always a struggle. I trying to make a go of my own freelance writing business and it is actually going well. Sadly due to it going so well might of lost some clients but hey I can only write so fast and I want them to order on my terms not a third party website that takes 14 days to get my funds, but I digress. Still this is a slow process and I wonder if it will ever be enough. The holidays are now approaching as well as my son' birthday. Will I be able to have party for him? What about Christmas? Again I'm in a threatening situation will we pull through this year? Still fighting for disability for I will not risk my son's happiness by risking my health to try and work. Last time I tried I just did some volunteer work and stressed my back. I was in pain for two weeks, yet I still had to be super mom and it took its toll which caused me to lash out at my son. He drew of picture of mommy yelling at him and that is where I stopped. This is what it will be like if I try to go out and work. Is that the kind of life I want my child to have his mother always yelling at him with horrible words that she is going to kill him, she wish she never had him. Then cry for she never meant to say those things or yell at him. I do not want that life for my son. A mother never means those words. It was the pain talking...it was the pain. Maybe if she buys him a new video game he will forgive her. I want my child to love me for loving him not cause I can buy him things. I will suceed though in my alternative, I pray and hope.